The Power and Style of Harlan Coben
Harlan Coben is an international bestselling author.
Harlan Coben has over forty-seven million books in print.
Harlan Coben is the only author to win the Edgar Award, the Shamus Award, and the Anthony Award.
If you've taken any of my editing courses (ECE, Deep Editing, Digging Deep, and Writing Body Language . . . ), you know the name Harlan Coben. You know he uses rhetorical devices. You know his writing carries psychological power.
You know he uses a certain rhetorical device in almost every prologue and/or first chapter.
You know that rhetorical device is anaphora.
Now that I've whomped your brain by using back-to-back examples of anaphora, let's dive in and check out how Harlan Coben uses rhetorical devices.
Example: From CAUGHT, March, 2010, end of the prologue
And that w
as when Marcia started to feel a small rock form in her chest.
There were no clothes in the hamper.
The rock in her chest grew when Marcia checked Haley’s toothbrush, then the sink and shower.
All bon e-dry.
The rock grew when she called out to Ted, trying to keep the panic out of her voice. It grew when they drove to captain’s practice and found out that Haley had never showed. It grew when she called Haley’s friends while Ted sent out an e-mail blast—and no one knew where Haley was. It grew when they called the local police, who, despite Marcia’s and Ted’s protestations, believed that Haley was a runaway, a kid blowing off some steam. It grew when forty-eight hours later, the FBI was brought in. It grew when there was still no sign of Haley after a week.
It was as if the earth had swallowed her whole.
A month passed. Nothing. Then two. Still no word. And then finally, during the third month, word came—and the rock that had grown in Marcia’s chest, the one that wouldn’t let her breathe and kept her up nights, stopped growing.
Analysis:
Visceral Response Shared Through Anaphora: He threaded the rock growing in her chest through the passage, ending the passage when it stopped growing. He doesn't tell the reader what that news of a difference means. But ending the prologue with those words, stopped growing, is as powerful as the soundtrack for Jaws.
Anaphora: Using the same word or phrase to start three (or more) consecutive phrases or sentences.
Compressed Time: The long paragraph compresses time by listing what they did during the first week to try to find Haley. The last paragraph compresses the passing of over two months into forty-one words.
Power Words: rock, bone-dry, panic, blast, protestations, runaway, FBI
White Space and Creative Paragraphing: Coben spotlighted the initial growing doom with white space around stand alone lines.
Varied Sentence Length and Structure: Used to enhance cadence, provide variety, draw the reader into the scene.
Cadence: The use of anaphora, sentence structure, and creative paragraphing contributed to a compelling cadence.
Example: From CAUGHT, 2010
"Off the record, we don't have a case. We don't have a body. We don't have a weapon. We have one witness--that would be you--and she never saw the shooter's face, so she really can't positively ID him."
Analysis:
Anaphora: Used in dialogue. Lists three things they don't have, followed by one thing they do have that doesn't help.
Example: From CAUGHT, 2010
Frank sat there, at her bedside, dry-eyed, holding on tightly to both her frail hand and his sanity.
Analysis:
Zeugma: Another rhetorical device. He holds two things tightly, two things that are unrelated, in different spheres -- her hand and his sanity.
Example: From CAUGHT, 2010
"Don't help me, okay? For my sake. For your sake. For everyone's sake."
Epistrophe: The opposite of anaphora. Using the same word or phrase to end three (or more) consecutive phrases or sentences.
Example: THE WOODS – Chapter One, first page, third paragraph . . .
I have learned over the years—in the most horrible ways imaginable—that the wall between life and death, between extraordinary beauty and mind-boggling ugliness, between the most innocent setting and a frightening bloodbath, is flimsy.
Harlan Coben carries that theme a few sentences later at the end of that same paragraph:
. . . and you remember how flimsy that wall really is.
Analysis:
Look what he conveyed in that compare and contrast sentence.
Power Words: horrible, death, ugliness, innocent, frightening bloodbath
Anaphora: between, between, between
Cadence: compelling
Backstory: The reader learns that the POV character has had some horrible life experiences--and he's likely to experience more horrible experiences in this story.
Example: From THE WOODS, Prologue, first page, third paragraph
I have never seen my father cry before—not when his own father died, not when my mother ran off and left us, not even when he first head about my sister, Camille.
Analysis: What did Coben accomplish?
He slipped backstory into anaphora. He gave the reader four hits of powerful backstory in one sentence. Four hits of powerful backstory in thirty-three words.
Read it out loud this time:
I have never seen my father cry before—not when his own father died, not when my mother ran off and left us, not even when he first head about my sister, Camille.
Strong cadence. Informative. Fast-paced. Intriguing. Enticing.
No chunk of backstory the reader is tempted to skim.
Plus - that one sentence introduces story questions. Why is his father crying? Why did his mother run off and leave them? What happened to his sister, Camille?
Harlan Coben is a gifted writer.
We can learn from analyzing his work. We can learn how to capture power and emotion on the page. We can learn how to write page turners.
FYI: I'm teaching Deep Editing: The EDITS System, Rhetorical Devices, and More, on-line starting May 3rd.
In the 320+ pages of lectures in Deep Editing, I teach writers how to use thirty rhetorical devices. I cover my EDITS System and deep editing techniques too. I share examples from dozens of masterful authors to explain and anchor my teaching points.


