Remember the movie HIGH CRIMES (2002), starring Morgan Freeman and Ashley Judd? HIGH CRIMES was based on a novel by Joseph Finder.

Several books followed--PARANOIA, COMPANY MAN, KILLER INSTINCT, POWER PLAY--all New York Times bestsellers. VANISHED, a 2009 release, debuted at #7 on the NYT list.

VANISHED is the first of a four-book series featuring a Special Forces trained corporate security specialist. The reviews for VANISHED, are so strong, some writers could be stricken with severe review envy.

 

REVIEWS:

"Written in staccato chapters that are emotionally supercharged and action packed, this thriller will more than satisfy adrenaline junkies and have them guessing until the veryVanished book cover end." --Publisher's Weekly

"Moves at the pace of an injected neuro-toxin. . . . You'll curse Finder for keeping you up into the early hours. . . . When I put the book down all I wanted to do was to start from the beginning again such was the pleasure I got from VANISHED." --Ali Karim, Shots magazine

"VANISHED is not only the best thriller of the summer, it's a strong candidate for the best of the year . . . It's the thrills in VANISHED that will get your blood pumping, but it's the emotions in it that will touch your heart." --Chicago Sun-Times

You felt it too?

A visceral trill of review envy.

Whether you write thrillers or historicals, suspense or inspirationals, mysteries or sci-fi, romances or paranormals--you want your words to fully engage your reader's mind and emotions. That's the secret to Joseph Finder nailing the New York Times bestseller list. In every component of novel writing, Finder excels. Realistic characters. Unpredictable plots. Revealing details. Page-turning pacing. Plus, powerful voice, internalizations, dialogue, action, setting, senses, body language, dialogue cues . . . .

 

Did I cover the critical components?

What about the craft and art of presenting the story on the page? Finding the right balance. Writing fresh. Powering up emotion.

Ah. You probably knew I would focus the Deep Editing Analysis on my area of expertise, writing with psychological power. I teach writers how to write page-turners.

I read and analyzed VANISHED on my Kindle. I always tag my favorite lines and passages with a one-line note, so I can go back and pull examples for my lectures and powerpoint presentations.

For VANISHED, I have twenty-two pages of one-line notes. That's over 220 examples of fresh writing that impressed me. Wish I could share them all here.

Example:

I'm pretty good at math--one of the few remaining legacies of my father, who was not only a math whiz but an immensely rich man before he went to prison.

Analysis:

What did Joe Finder accomplish in that one sentence? He slipped in a powerful shard of back story. And--he backloaded the power word, prison, to hit the reader with a punch.

Example:

"Are you here about my husband?"

Garvin wore steel aviator rim glasses with thick lenses that grotesquely magnified his bleary pale eyes--gray? Blue? Hard to say. "Mrs. Heller, we'd like to ask you some questions about what happened."

The throbbing behind her eyes was back with a vengeance. "Are you . . . homicide detectives?" she asked in a choked voice.

He shook his head, gave a prim smile. "We're from the Violent Crimes Branch."

The words made her stomach flip over. "Detective, where's my husband?" she said, heart thudding. "Have you found him or not?"

Analysis:

Did you notice the scene-themed power words?

-- grotesquely, throbbing, vengeance, choked, violent, crime

Two short and powerful visceral hits: stomach flip, heart thud. If you know my EDITS System, you know those phrases are PINK. They carry visceral power.

Read it out loud.

NOTICE:

Stimulus-Response: The smooth stimulus-response patterns draw you in. Keep you reading.

Dialogue: The dialogue sounds natural. Short. Nailing the point.

White Space: The piece is easy to digest. No long passages that re-tell or over-tell the story. No invitations to skim.

Cadence: The passage flows. You want to read more.

Example:

She told them everything she could. Garvin asked all the questions; Scarpino, clearly the recessive gene, said nothing, took notes.

Analysis:

Those two sentences, seemingly invisible, carry multiple teaching points. They provide strong examples of how to:

1. Compress Time: Finder compressed time and kept the story moving forward.

2. Deepen Characterization: The reader has more insight into the two detectives.

3. Slip in a Humor Hit: Finder had fun with the reader with the recessive gene phrase,

4. Keep Hooking the Reader: That Humor Hit also resonated and strengthened a "Yes Set" for readers. We all know someone recessive-gene-challenged like Scarpino. The reader internally nods at the humor, and at the personality type. Finder sets more hooks. Reels the reader deeper into his fictional world.

5. Write Tight: Those twenty words could have been narrative-stretched to thirty or forty or fifty-plus words. I'll repeat a phrase from above to hammer my point. Finder avoided giving the reader an invitation to skim.

Example:

"You know what was in that container, don't you?" I said. "What was being shipped out of Bahrain?"

"I didn't ask." Jay was too skilled to look evasive.

"But you know anyway," I said.

He laughed. Sometimes talking with him was like fencing. "Don't ask, don't tell."

"I think you know damned well what was in those boxes." I said it in a good-humored way, not wanting to come off as confrontational. Confrontational rarely worked with him.

He chewed the inside of his cheeks, which was always the giveaway that he was trying to decide whether to tell a lie. The "tell," as they say in poker. Stoddard was practiced in the art of deception, but my skill at reading people is better. I give full credit for this to my father, who was a liar the way some people are alcoholics.

Analysis:

This time, I'm making you work. Take three minutes and analyze that passage.

Notice the body language?

Dialogue cues?

Subtext?

Internalizations?

Cadence?

Back story?

Backloading?

Rhetorical devices?

I'll help with the rhetorical devices.

Similes:

-- Sometimes talking with him was like fencing.

-- . . . who was a liar the way some people are alcoholics.

Anadiplosis:

-- . . . not wanting to come off as confrontational. Confrontational rarely worked with him.

One More Example: The Set Up -- The POV character visits his father in prison. Roger is the POV character's brother.

"Special," he said. He rolled the word around in his mouth like the first sip of a Chateau Lafite. His lips curled at the edges. "Hooah."

The day he entered prison, Dad gave Roger his most prized possession, a gold Patek Philippe watch that Mom had given him when he made his first hundred million. Inscribed on the back was a line from Virgil in Latin: Audentes fortuna juvat. Fortune favors the bold. He'd been bold all right, but Fortune hadn't gotten the memo.

Analysis:

Dialogue cue: He rolled the word around in his mouth like the first sip of a Chateau Lafite. That dialogue cue is fresh, fun, character-themed, and ironic.

Backstory: Finder shared the scope of their riches, spotlighting the gargantuan plummet from uber-rich to prison-poor.

Hints of father-son relationship: The reader picks up that the POV character doesn't respect his father.

Humor Hit: He'd been bold all right, but Fortune hadn't gotten the memo.

Joseph Finder strives for excellence on the page. It shows. And it works.

Don't let review envy derail you. Dig deep and deep edit. Excel in all areas of writing and you'll earn reviews that could boost you onto the New York Times bestseller list.