Welcome

Donnell Bell,

author of

The Past

Came Hunting

Donnell Bell, two time Golden Heart finalist , prefers writing fiction to writing about stock portfolios or treating diaper rash. She has a background in court reporting, has worked with kids and engineers, and has volunteered for law enforcement and other organizations. Raised in New Mexico 's Land of Enchantment, Donnell has called the state of Colorado home for the past twenty-four years.

Deep Editing Q & A for Donnell Bell:

1.  What’s your writing process?

My process is to leave the computer entirely.  Go into my bedroom or onto my patio or anywhere separate from e-mail and the Internet and free my mind from all the chaos that is buckshot at us every second of the day.  I’m strange, in that I have to fool myself.  If I take a shortcut and type out my words, I want to edit them.

Because I take shorthand, I write my first draft in Gregg’s almost now-defunct scrawl.  It works great because my mind flows free and I write fast with these brief forms.  Moreover, because I have to transcribe to see what I’ve written, editing’s impossible.

After I transcribe my shorthand, I print it out in my notebook -- still judiciously avoiding the keyboard (Again, I cannot be trusted with e-mail and the Internet), and I print out draft two.  Here I may edit word choices and produce a messy, messy second draft.

Then, finally, when I have it all printed out, I type out my chapters.  That makes a total of three drafts.  From there, it’s pretty clean and ready for critique.

Pantser? Plotter?  Both:

I wrote my first four books by being a pantster.  Midway through, I realized I needed an outline. So I start out writing, just having fun, and then something clicks and I start plotting future scenes and the outcome.

Do you strive to complete a first draft in a certain time frame?

As an unpublished author, I’ve found that the Golden Heart contest is a great deadline marker.  Every manuscript I’ve written I’ve targeted to enter the Golden Heart.  That’s one manuscript a year, fellow writers, and that’s doable.  It also trains you to produce.

I’m working on my first series, and editing old manuscripts (one I plan to run through Margie’s Immersion Class), because it’s a good book!  I want it to be great book, however.  So my goal is to get faster.  (Heaven help me ;).

How long do you allow for deep editing a complete manuscript?

Three to four months.  I leave it alone for a couple of weeks and try to come back and look at it with fresh eyes.  If you get too close to the work, you lose objectivity in my opinion.  Don’t believe me?  Pull out an old manuscript you loved and your mother said was terrific.  I have one of those.  Mom loved it!  I’m red-faced every time I read it.

2.  What are some deep editing tools you learned from me, and how did they make a difference in your writing?

I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE Margie Lawson’s Empowering Characters' Emotions course.

True Story:  I’d never heard of Margie Lawson until I double-finaled in Colorado Romance Writers Heart of the Rockies contest.  But one of my judges took my entry, and, from there, she highlighted it with these pretty pastel colors.  Blue for dialogue, pink for emotional (tied to physical reaction), Green for description, Orange for tension, sexual, conflict, and Yellow for internalization.

Aside from the judge’s flattering comments, I saw her point about how the manuscript could be improved.  From that point, I had to find out who this Margie person was and see why she was so great at coloring.  I had her put on a full-day workshop for my local chapter, then attended another in Denver, and even drove the 70+ miles to two other workshops she presented.  I’m a listener, and many of you out there can take online workshops and grasp it just fine.  I, on the other hand, do better when I hang on every word.  Plus, with Margie there in person, I didn’t have to share -- as much ;).  The Empowerment workshop just made sense to me, and when I edit I make sure that I have power words at the end of my sentences.  Great technique.

3.  Donnell is good at showing incongruencies that add interest and power:

Then in an authoritative timbre at odds to his cowardly behavior and sloppy looks, he raised his voice. “Melanie Norris. You’ve been served.”

Margie Asked Donnell:  Do you consciously think about included contradictions, or are they gifts from your subconscious?

I think a little of both, and from years of reading authors who do it well.  I also try to visualize what my protagonist is seeing.  I could have just written, he shouted, but because I like to write tight, I incorporated her point of view into that sentence.

4.  Loved the way Donnell contrasted descriptions of two characters, showed the POV character’s visceral response, and used it as a plot point.

Joe stared at the man seated between the two detectives and his parched throat dried altogether. His last hope had been that Givens was an alias for Drake Maxwell. But this scrawny dude with his pock-marked face was too young to be Maxwell, and to be blunt, too damned ugly. The Drake Maxwell Joe remembered had been solidly built and decent looking, hence his ability to influence a young Melanie Daniels.

Margie Asked Donnell:  Is the piece above close to the first draft? If not, what changed?

I went back and looked at a previous draft.  I moved one sentence down; otherwise, it’s exact.

5.  This piece grabbed me:

“Chico, wake up.”

Through a haze and someone’s shaking, fifteen years of prison life slammed into Drake’s dreams. He grabbed his assailant and flung the bastard away from him and onto his back.

An instant later, as his eyes adjusted, he remembered where he was and saw that lying on the mattress beneath him was Maria. Ramirez’s younger sister stared up at him, startled and surprised. Drake, however, studied her as if she were a cross between an amoeba and a succulent meal. Then, remembering she paid the mortgage on the place and he was hiding out in her basement, he reluctantly rolled off of her. His mouth dryer than a piece of cotton, his head screaming from too many shots of tequila, he asked, “What are you doing down here?”

Her eyes flashed with something that looked like anger. Slowly, she lifted herself up on her elbows in the cold, unfinished basement. Behind her brother’s back they’d been giving each other come-do-me-looks for days. If she was afraid of him, she sure as hell didn’t show it.

A few lines later:

Something like electricity jolted through Drake, a conduit transmitting her “I’m-available” signals.

Loved that chapter opening!  Your writing grabs the reader and slams Drake’s experience into our minds.

Those examples share body language, setting, internalizations, pain, and a visceral hit—and those scene components are presented with a compelling cadence. Well done!

Applying my EDITS System:

“Chico, wake up.”

Through a haze and someone’s shaking, fifteen years of prison life slammed into Drake’s dreams. He grabbed his assailant and flung the bastard away from him and onto his back. An instant later, as his eyes adjusted, he remembered where he was and saw that lying on the mattress beneath him was Maria. Ramirez’s younger sister stared up at him, startled and surprised. Drake, however, studied her as if she were a cross between an amoeba and a succulent meal. Then, remembering she paid the mortgage on the place and he was hiding out in her basement, he reluctantly rolled off of her. His mouth dryer than a piece of cotton, his head screaming from too many shots of tequila, he asked, “What are you doing down here?”

Her eyes flashed with something that looked like anger. Slowly, she lifted herself up on her elbows in the cold, unfinished basement. Behind her brother’s back they’d been giving each other come-do-me-looks for days. If she was afraid of him, she sure as hell didn’t show it.

A few lines later:

Something like electricity jolted through Drake, a conduit transmitting her “I’m-available” signals.

Teaching Point for Margie Grads:

The first two PINKS are not emotionally triggered, but they carry some visceral power.  I made them sort-of dashed – to differentiate them from full-fledged Visceral Responses. I recommend PINK Dashes for PAIN experienced by POV characters.

The solid PINK is an emotionally triggered visceral response.

Margie Asked Donnell:

Do you have my EDITS System imprinted in your mind when you write and edit?

When a scene isn’t working, do you grab your highlighters and analyze the scene, see what colors dominate, see what’s missing?

Are there times when you check a scene for one or two EDITS colors? Do you highlight on paper, or just think the colors while editing?

It’s very difficult to edit on screen for me.  I print it out and back away from the keyboard.  By now I’m keenly aware of the EDITS system. There are just times when I know something’s missing.  I read my work out loud.  You mentioned cadence, and your ear will oftentimes catch what your eyes do not.  If something’s lacking, out come my trusted highlighters.

Thanks, Margie for your excellent teaching and for this opportunity!

Thank you! I'm proud to feature you on my Pubbed Margie Grad blog. Thank you for being here today!

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